Listen, I get it. Debt sucks. Student loans suck. You accumulated this massive amount of debt: $20,000, $40,000 even $150,000 or more and now you are having a hard time finding a job or finding a way to pay back that debt. The learning, fun, connections and seclusion of college has worn off and the harsh realities of the big real world are sinking in and it’s not easy. It’s tough, it’s frustrating, you have this anchor of debt like a chain around your neck dragging you down, it’s not what you expected and it’s not fair. I get it.
So now a manipulative politician comes along and, treating you like a coddled misbehaved child, and convinces you that it’s everyone else’s fault. He tells you just what you want to hear. It’s “the rich”, “the 1%”, “the bankers” and so on…they are the reason things suck for you now. The politician will focus on the problem while being light on the solutions. As they patronizingly have you hold up signs explaining just how bad it is, they stir the emotions of all the others who feel they too have been given a bad deal. “something just isn’t right!” come the cries. There is some vague reason that this system hurt your feelings. “They” are the reason poor little you is burdened with this debt. If you just vote for the hack saying the right words, everything will be rosy again.

Bullshit.

You chose to take out the debt. You did. No one else did. No one made you. It was a voluntary choice you made. No one forced you to sign the papers, no one committed fraud in explaining the loan terms to you. You did it. Part of being an adult is taking responsibility for your own actions. You made a bad decision. You probably shouldn’t have borrowed tens of thousands of dollars without a plan on how to pay it back. It’s pretty basic common sense.

Ironically, in addition to yourself, if there was anyone to blame it would be the very same politicians who talk about “free college” and erasing your debt. for these politicians are the same brand of asshole who inflated college costs at three times the inflation rate by throwing good money after bad with guaranteed student loans. College administrators saw tuitions and budgets soar, awash in easy money backed by taxpayers. The colleges, some of them even for profit corporations, latched on to this and ran with it. They promised you golden opportunities and great job prospects for a measly few tens of thousands of dollars. People got so caught up in the easy money that they stopped asking basic questions like “How will I repay this?”

You got conned.

You got scammed just as sure as that first time you went to buy a car alone and a sleezeball salesman tried to rope you in to a bad deal. You got conned just as sure as the time you paid $20 on the streets of NYC for a music CD you didn’t really want. And you know what? This is part of learning. This is called taking responsibility for ones actions.

I know you want to think you were brilliant and academic…that you didn’t make a bad decision…that it’s everyone else’s fault. But it’s not. It’s your fault. You took the loan and didn’t have a good plan to pay it back. Check your privilege. College is a luxury, not a necessity. Additionally for some it’s in no small part a social experience. C’mon, be honest: wasn’t social life even a little part of your decisions leading to and during college? Were your choice of major and your study habits really all about getting gainful employment to pay back the debt or did you honestly not think it through that much?

Now I’m just talking about average loans here for common degrees. If you were one of the ones who took out a loan for some new, cool specialized degree with no real job prospects and now you are mad that you can’t earn from it then your case is even worse. Sorry but if you majored in “Women’s Studies”, “Ancient Literature”, “Race Relations” or some other thing and now you are mad that you can’t get a job from it, you weren’t just conned…you were down right stupid.

What the hell kind of fool spends $50,000 on something without researching if it’s worth it financial in terms of an ROI? (ROI means return on investment in case they didn’t teach you that when you were busy learning about Celtic Architecture between parties). Those degrees are not an investment, they are a hobby. The politician asking for your vote won’t tell you this and the multi-million dollar marketing brochure and slick college recruiters sure as hell won’t tell you this. But thinking a degree that is not in demand in the workplace will pay you back is stupid. There ain’t no “women’s studies” factory or startup with plans for an IPO. Sorry.

There is nothing at all wrong with hobbies. Hobbies and esoteric academic pursuits are great and worthwhile. In some rare cases people can pursue a career in these areas, in many cases they can contribute to society. That’s great. I wish everyone could do so. It’s a pursuit and luxury for either the very rich or for those non-rich who made a decision to not bitch about money or ask for someone else to cover it. If someone made a conscious decision that they would have crappy debt but it’s worth it to purse a calling, great, good for you. But if you did it because you thought you could earn from it without a clear plan and research of the demand in the workplace you made a downright stupid decision.

I’m going to be honest with you. Unlike the asshole politicians and clueless academics who are feeding your narcissistic world view that everyone owes you something and it’s everyone else’s fault, I don’t want your vote. I don’t want you to double down on stupid now that you can’t find a job with an undergrad and pay me even more tuition for a graduate degree. I won’t tell you what you want to hear because I’m not running for office or collecting fat tuition checks from you.

The honest truth is that you need to pull your head out of your ass and stop blaming everyone else. You screwed up, you blew it. It’s a damn expensive lesson at $20k or 100k or more. But it’s on you. Use this lesson and learn from it and make better decisions as your life progresses. It is on you. It’s not on me so don’t ask me to work some percentage of my workday to pay for your screw up…and sure as hell don’t ask me to pay for your hobby. Don’t ask millions of hard working Americans who never had the privilege to go to college at all to pay for your four years of personal enrichment. Don’t ask the people who did go to college but who implemented a plan to sensibly pay back their debt to also pay yours. It’s not on the banks or the rich or anyone else. It’s on you. Now grow up, don’t be a leech, do something productive, move on and stop asking others to pay for your mistake.